GALT Consulting LLC

Earlier this week I posted an article on Failures to Communicate, discussing how the words we choose can define how we see the world & how two people can say the same things but have completely different intentions. To follow up on that, I asked Matthew P. Block to give us some tips on how to avoid those situations.

Language is a tricky thing because it controls the way we think & is controlled by the way we think. Even though we have standard definitions for all of our words, our minds rarely work from those definitions. Instead we bring connotations from past interactions & experience to every conversation or attempt to communicate we make. Since we all have different experiences, we all have different connotations & ideas associated with our words. That can create a lot of confusion if you assume you're on the same page as someone you're talking to. Here are a few ways to avoid that confusion & get on the same page.

1. Ask "What do you mean by that?" The surest way to make sure you're taking words to be used as intended, is to ask for a definition. If you're not absolutely, positively sure how someone you're listening to would explain a term they're using, just ask. Feel free to make it clear you understand the concept, but have heard it used different ways & want to be sure you're on the same page with them. They'll be glad you're listening & really care about what they're saying.

2. Give definitions yourself. If it's a good idea to ask what other people mean, it's also a good idea to not wait for others to ask. Go ahead & offer definitions on any words or phrases that are central to the message you're trying to convey. Being proactive in this way can save you a lot of misunderstandings.

3. Avoid cliches, buzzwords, or commonly used phrases. If you have to, make up a new word, term, or phrase. When you make up something new, you're less likely run afoul of negative connotations your audience has associated with terms they've used in a different context previously. The more often a term is used, the more different interpretations people will have of what that term means. So avoid common, cliche phrases, especially when you're communicating anything important.

4. Never use words like best, worst, etc. They are the worst.....excuse me, most easily misinterpreted.....words you'll ever use. Almost unfailingly, the way other people define best or worst will differ from the way you define it. Instead use phrases like most profitable, fastest, or easiest to learn. If you want to know what the best of something is, you'd better pick what you'd want it to be best at. Very few people, places, or products can be the best at everything. If you don't set criteria for how to judge what's best, there's a good chance you're not on the same page as your audience.

5. Repeat yourself, but never verbatim. By rehashing things in different words, you increase the odds that any conflict of meaning will be discovered & help more clearly define what you're looking to get across. Try as often as possible to rephrase & rehash anything that you think is important to your message.

6. Always encourage & look for feedback. Ask if people have questions. Look for expressions on your audience's face. Always pause to give people a chance to think of anything they might not be clear on. It's amazing how much confusion & misunderstanding can be cleared up by just taking some time to listen.

Matthew P. Block studied communication at Missouri State University & is the Internet Communication Manager for Heligonix. You can find his writing on communication, public relations, & marketing issues posted fresh every Monday (& sometimes more frequently) at the Heligonix Blog.